Saturday, May 27, 2006

Sequoia Reviews X3! (Woo-Hoo!)

Sequoia and I both went out to watch X3 yesterday (on separate continents, mind you) and what follows is her lengthy, awesome review of the movie. Mine will follow sometime later but let me say this already: I want a Beast-movie! :) Anyway, read on, true believer... and beware of spoilers!

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Moviefone: "What are your mutant’s hobbies and interests?"
Famke Janssen: "They do puzzles together, Cyclops and Jean.."
James Marsden: "They do puzzles together, that’s it, big puzzles of Logan, big Wolverine puzzles."


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I went to see X-Men: The Last Stand with high hopes but very low expectations. I had spoiled myself with trailers and a few minor clips, and stumbled across the fates of several characters while online, but did not know any details. Online reviews from fans and critics alike seemed to bemoan it as a travesty of proportions so dire and epic I assumed the worst - it would be a absolute butchering of characters and storyline, sloppily rushed through, with no heart and soul, but hey, it promised Magneto and Phoenix sharing at least one scene, and I’m easy that way. As my two favorite characters from the comics, their smallest interaction of any sort, in any incarnation, can leave me feeling embarassingly giddy.


What I discovered was that The Last Stand doesn’t suck. Not only does it not suck, I found it extremely enjoyable throughout, and it is my favorite X-Men film by a significant margin. Was I completely happy? Was it perfect? Absolutely not. At times it’s a deeply flawed film, but never fundamentally so; and it entertained me in a genuine way. There were more than a few moments that thrilled me. And I can’t wait to see it again.


Before I go into more detail about what I did and didn’t care for in The Last Stand, I feel I should say a little bit about what I do and don’t like about the X-Men in general, because I have particular tastes that influenced my feelings on the film. I started reading the comics with the Roy Thomas/Neal Adams issues and adored them until Claremont flaked out during the Madelyne storyline. To see it go from a dark, Hitchcockian thriller (if you’re a fan of the old comics and have somehow never seen Vertigo, do so as soon as possible - Scott, Madelyne, Jean, and Jason are paying more homage to Scottie, Madeleine, Judy, and Gavin than the Brood did to Aliens) to a simple coincidence was severely disappointing, but I stuck with it because I loved the characters. And then X-Factor happened, and the wholesale slaughter of history and character. And I despaired.


Since then I’ve had some mild enjoyment from a handful of Lobdell issues; loved Joe Kelly and Steven Seagle on the books and the excitement and hope they gave me; and tried my best to give Morrison a chance until his Emma/Scott storyline took a sharp detour from where I thought he was going, and turned out to be nothing more than a bad episode of Melrose Place. I haven’t read more than five 616 comics since. I loathed the 90's cartoon, didn’t care for Evolution, and think Ultimate X-Men is half-way decent at times. I have the habit and ability to completely and happily disregard large chucks of continuity (i.e, The Great Phoenix Retcon).


Most importantly, I adore the possibilities of fanfiction and their endless alternate ideas and stories, and I view the movieverse as Marvel sanctioned fanfiction. Every fanfiction writer is different - good writers telling good stories, bad writers telling bad stories, bad writers telling good stories, and good writers telling bad - or just not that interesting to you - stories. For me, the first two X-Men films fall into that last category. I don’t mind if Brett Ratner didn’t copy Bryan Singer’s vision because I didn’t like Bryan Singer’s vision (I do like Bryan Singer, House is excellent and I’m interested in Superman for the first time in my life).


While technically proficient, I found the films largely tedious, X1 moreso than X2, but both were guilty. I like many slow, methodical movies shot through with occasional bursts of action if you’re lucky - The Constant Gardener was my favorite movie of 2005 - but I don’t want to see that in an X-Men film because I don’t think anyone in Hollywood is capable of doing it well. Not with this many characters and this much history to sift through and condense and the stigma of it being a comic book. I think Singer was Hollywood’s best chance at making that kind of movie, and with the exception of a few moments here and there that rose above the rest I was left sitting there thinking, ‘God, this is boring. Why did he want to make it so boring? What’s wrong with me that I’m finding this so boring?’


I honestly feel that Ratner has continued in Singer’s footsteps, which includes making sure not to vary from the idea that in this alternate universe, Logan is the center, the Hero, the character all others sit around making puzzles of, only he’s given it a shot of much needed energy. That Logan continues to be the focus and that many thing do not line up with their view of how they should be, or how they are in the 616 universe, twists many fans into paroxysms of indignant rage - a feeling I’m very familiar with when reading X-Factor and 90's era comics but that I’m blessedly free of while watching the films, the same way I am while reading fanfiction. This is the whole point of creating an alternate universe, to do things differently while keeping the basic core of who the characters are the same.




I felt alive while watching The Last Stand. There were scenes that made me gasp, scenes that made me cry, scenes that made me scoff, and scenes that made me yearn for more. I was never bored. A little hollow with thinking of how perfect it could have been if there had only been about fifteen minutes more devoted to the Phoenix storyline, and feeling as though scenes were not rushed (I quite liked the quick pace) but sadly a little clipped in places. A better editing team would have made all the difference in the world.


Anyway, if you’re still with me after all this rambling, some specific comments about The Last Stand.


- Famke Janssen finally sold me on Jean. I love her as an actress, think she’s gorgeous, but she was my choice for the role of Mystique since I first saw her in Goldeneye and while watching the first two films, I’d always think, ‘Eh, she’s good, but I wonder who else would have been better.’ I no longer even want to think of someone who may have been better. I have a different ‘picture’ in my head of comics and fanfic Jean, but Famke embodies movieverse Jean to perfection. Every expression, every inflection of tone, the way she carried herself... she portrayed the confusion, fury, passion, sorrow, and insanity so consummately it gave me chills. I loved the perpetual ‘forgetting to breathe’ expression when she wasn’t actively doing something. Even the way she sat in the chair, waiting for Xavier, touched me - she looked at once so lost and as though she were laying in wait. I only wish there had been more of her, and I wasn’t the only one - the only specific comments I overheard after the movie were ‘The Phoenix stuff was really good’ and ‘There should have been more of Phoenix.’


- Young Jean wasn’t as good as I would have liked. I wanted to see a bit of vulnerability there, mixed with the haughty bitchiness. I wanted to feel like she was Jean with Phoenix tendencies, not like Jean is nothing more than a neutered Phoenix. It’s why the Jean/Phoenix dichotomy is so interesting and complex to me... both sides of the personality are organically hers. But the special effects used on Charles and Erik in that scene were awesome.


- Patrick Stewart finally sold me on Xavier. I always thought his casting was lazy. So he’s bald, he never reminded me of Xavier, although I like him very much. And in the first two films, Stewart portrayed Charles as the simple, benevolent, saintly, glossed over version of the character I detest. Like Harry Potter, Charles Xavier is not interesting to me when everyone around him thinks he’s wonderful, including the narrator. Xavier is controlling, whatever his reasons. He is not just righteous, he is also self-righteous. He is a hypocrite of the highest order. And I love him for it. It balances nicely with his truly good heart and endless optimism. In The Last Stand, when he was talking to Logan in the infirmary, and later to Erik and Jean, I saw Xavier for the first time. There was an edge, a determination. He’s not all soft and cuddly, he’s a man to be reckoned with.


- Ian McKellen has always been fabulous as Magneto and my favorite part of the first two films...he was no less spectacular this time, but I was shocked at his coldness, particularly towards Mystique. I could see movieverse Erik turning on her in that he no longer feels there’s a place for him by his side, but to leave her, naked and alone, in the middle of nowhere, after she’s just saved him from a fate he views worse than death? Cold. And jarring. I would have liked to have seen more kindness from him there, a gentleness, a brief scene letting us know that he would make sure she was okay even if he doesn’t want her as a partner any longer. One of the biggest problems in the movie, in my opinion, because it would have fixed a giant plot hole - heartless in the name of his cause, I can see, but I can never see Erik as stupid. And it was stupid to turn his back on her like that, especially since they still could have had Raven turn on him later. She could have felt betrayed without it being done so completely.


- I thought Jean’s rise from the lake was handled well, with the special effects - the vortex in the water scared me, and the glowing light was beautiful - but I wanted a longer moment with Scott. And I don’t know why, but it really bugs that she resurrected in that hideous uniform. If Rebecca can have a ‘nude’ scene, so can Famke. As much as I once loved Scott in the comics, it doesn’t bother me he’s played such a tiny role in the movieverse. Famke and James conveyed a sense of being in love, but not a sense of being soulmates forever and ever, as Scott and Jean did in the comics around the Dark Phoenix saga. I don’t mind that he was killed because it makes more sense in this world for Logan to be the one to save her at the end. I just wish that people at the school had expressed more sorrow over his death; and I don’t know how they would have done it, but I really would have liked to have seen a scene at the end of the film, maybe right before the credits, of Jean and Scott on the astral plane/afterlife, together, and at peace. I have a picture of him kissing her on the forehead, forgiving her for what she’s done.


- I liked Storm this time around. Don’t tell anyone. I liked her twirly whirlies, and how strong she was in her opinions, despite her complete lack of empathy and compassion for mutants that might not be as blessed as her.

- The woman who played Callisto was awful. Just a terrible actress, in my opinion. The weakest link in the cast by far. I wanted to laugh every time she spoke. Even her smile annoyed me.

- That’s some rapid sunset they have their in San Francisco. I enjoyed the bridge scene greatly - Magneto didn’t want to just go to Alcatraz, he was making a statement. Liked seeing him ‘fly’.

- I expected to hate Juggernaut, and thought he was very well done. Ellen Page as Kitty Pryde was an inspiration. My heart just swelled watching their scene together, it was like looking at a comic book come to life.

- The view out of Leech’s window is more exciting than what’s on his tv.

- Bah to bad dialogue. All three movies have had their share, the only ones that made me actively cringe in this installment were the ‘Hell hath no fury’ from our 120 year old president, and Magneto’s stint as the Exposition Fairy. ‘Arclight, use your seismic powers over there! Aim for their weapons!’ Sheesh. I think I’m blocking some of it, it was so bad. Just say Arclight and gesture grandly in the general direction. You’re Magneto.

- Magneto. Not Osama bin Laden in a miniature cave that looks as though it were made of compressed Glad trash bags.




- Biggest flaw in the movie for me, and the only thing that truly bothers me - I understand that after Jean kills Charles, Erik makes a choice. He still wants her with him, even after what she’s done (the look on her face, and his, the way he puts his arm around her and says, ‘come with me, dear’ just kills me). They need to get out of there before Wolverine and Storm come on the scene. But there needed to be a scene in the movie between that one and the speech in the forest where they have some sort of further acknowledgement about what just happened. This is big. She killed Charles Xavier. Her mentor and his best friend. A man who meant a tremendous amount to both of them. I don’t care if it’s alone, or together - I’d prefer both - but there needs to be something. Anything. I found myself imagining possible scenes, to make the rest of the movie feel more right. I feared that there would be no sign at all from either that they even remembered that it happened, but I quite liked Magneto’s reaction to Pyro. That was good. But it would have been better with another scene preceding it.


- I really liked the use of Multiple Man. I was all groany when I heard he’d be in the movie, since his comic book incarnation annoys me to no end. Maybe it was the judicious way he was used, but I found it smart and fun, and a little bit surprising.


- Angel and Beast. First Angel - I’m sorry, I’m shallow, I thought the actor was homely and not terribly talented. Little Warren was very good, Big Warren was just meh. And Warren Worthington III should never be meh. If they had to use him in that role, they should have dropped him after he flew off into the sunset. Showing up at the school at precisely the right moment to make me roll my eyes all the back into my head was a waste of time that took away from Phoenix. And what the hell with his father at the end? Was he hovering, waiting, for someone to throw his dad off the building? He just happened by? Beast I hated at the beginning and grew to really really like by the end. Hank is one of my favorites in the comics, and I just didn’t like Kelsey Grammer in the role. I know, I’m in the minority, but it didn’t feel right. But I warmed up to him, even if I hated the makeup job. He looked like a fuzzy, electric blue, tank. Loved hearing stars and garters...I think I would have let myself love him if only there had been a mention by Hank of what was happening to Jean and what happened to Scott. I think it’s implied that Scott, Hank, and Jean were Xavier’s first X-Men in the movieverse, I would have liked to have seen a mention of that, even if it was just a photograph on the desk. Hank and Jean are my favorite friendship in the X-Men and I felt its absence sorely. I know, I know, alternate universe.


- Fastball Special! Woo!


- Can’t believe I’m only now getting to Wolverine. I loved him, as always. To me Jackman is Wolverine, the best Wolverine. Everything I like about comics Wolverine and nothing I hate. I thought the progression in his character was consistent with the movieverse, and organic. I like my Logan tall, I like him lovesick over Jean, I love him slicing and dicing to protect the ones he loves. And ooooh, the kiss. Hot. And scary. But mostly hot.




- Iceman and Colossus look like such dorks when iced/metaled up. I thought CGI was better than that these days.


- Olivia Williams is Moira MacTaggert. Fantastic. And I didn’t hate the secret scene like I thought I would. Didn’t like it that much, but didn’t hate it.


- Glad Mopey Rogue went for the cure. Maybe now she can finally be spirited. Or the slightest bit like her comic counterpart. Just a basic personality trait. A crumb. Not 90's sexpot, ‘why, ah don’t have a thought in my pretty little head, Gambit!’ Rogue, but tough and sassy and kind of dark and sometimes whiny kickass 80's Rogue. Oh wait, she’s cured, she can’t. This is why I wish they would freaking teach her to control her powers so she’d have something else to do besides mope and whine and stoically cope.


- I think Pyro is the worst character in the movie. Honestly. Phoenix is clearly insane, and I think a rather good case can be made for Magneto as well at times. The humans behind the cure were misguided, but seemed to genuinely want to ‘help’. When Pyro said that he would have killed Xavier if Magneto had asked....my skin crawled.


- Liked the use of Leech. Didn’t mind the ‘cure’ storyline, but really had to suspend disbelief at times...didn’t mind though, because I was having so much fun with the movie in general. The we are the world, sunshine and kittens and lollypops at the end of the rainbow ending had me scratching my head a bit though. Looks like everything is perfect in human-mutant land! No more X movies! Except when Wolverine has to get thrown all over by a recovered Magneto in his spin-off.


- Jean’s death. So close to being so perfect. I was welling up with tears. It was ridiculous in a lot of ways, but I loved it. It had to be done that way. But it needed to be longer. Shave off a little bit of Angel, of Leech, of Arclight dragging WWII up to the roof, whatever, but let Jean and Logan express more emotion. Let her say something more. Let it him hold her longer. It was good, it was beautiful in its way, but I wanted it to be everything it was capable of being. They were so close.


Anyway, that’s it for now, my hands are falling off and it’s 11pm and been a hard day and I don’t know if I’m still making sense. I’ll be seeing it again on Monday, and will be interested to see if my views on anything have changed.


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And that, as they say, was that. Many thanks to the most wonderful woman in the world for putting so much effort in this review. I'm inclined to say "ditto" pretty much across the board, but I shall certainly endeavor to come up with something more ludicrously loquacious than that! In any case, I enjoyed this review tremendously, and I am sure I am not the only one. If any of you reading this want to read more of Sequoia's thoughts (on the X-Men or on anything), please do tell in the comments section, for in my not-exactly-humble opinion the world at large should be graced with her thoughts far more often!

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